To be clear, I’m talking about the club kind where’s there’s a dance floor, a DJ, and a crowd looking for a night of dancing, booze, and a good time (a.k.a. nightclub). To make it even more clearer, here’s a perfect example of a club that I’m referring to: Republiq at Resorts World, or Fiamma, or Opus, etc.
I’m not what you call a ‘party animal’, but I often go out with new and old friends to nightclubs. Because of this, I’d often get messages not only from friends but even from strangers over the internet (most especially through my Tumblr page) asking as to what they should do, what they should wear, etc. etc. if they’re going to a club. Evidently, they were first-timers, and recently, the questions were getting too many, and no offense, but answering all of them privately was getting really troublesome especially since some were getting a bit too too repetitive. So that’s when I thought… why don’t I just make a compilation? Right? So yessss! This post will be some sort of helpful FAQ!
First thing first: this entry is obviously just for the girls. I wouldn’t dare give tips to guys because clearly… I’m not a guy! I have no right for that. Besides, I know that they know what they’re doing and what their A-game is for the night. *wink* (So I think my task here is to protect all the innocent girls!) Kidding aside, I’m just going to try and be as honest as I could on this one because there’s no use in sugarcoating the clubbing scene. Here it goes, ladies!
BEFORE THE PARTY I’m going to view the situation as though you and your girls just suddenly decided to go partying at a club here in the metro. So yes, this isn’t about a private party at a club with your friends, because that setting is different from the actual club scene that’s full of strangers.
Also, I don’t claim to be a ‘know-it-all’ about clubbing. What I’m going to share here is just up to the best of my knowledge to help you, first-timers. That’s all.
- Get into a guest list.
It saves you money and also from lining up. Better if you know a promoter, if not, just type away in Google the name of the club plus the words “guest list” and there’s sure to be links that’ll help direct you to the right people/promoters. Just be mindful of their requirements like if you should print out the confirmation or if you should be in the club before midnight.
- Get a table. Or not. Either is fine.
If you’ve got the money, if you love your feet, and if there’s a lot of you, then yes, get one. But most of the time, my friends and I wouldn’t get a table because we’re mainly there to dance. (Nope, not even for the booze. We usually ‘pre-drink’ too.) Of course we don’t consider it practical to buy a table when for the rest of the night we’re going to go around and actually parrrttteeeeh (a.k.a. kill our feet off) aaaand if some new people we meet will have tables: then surely, we will just use and dominate their table as well. End result: free table! Haha!
- Dress smart.
With today’s time, we’re all so fashion-conscious so I think ya’ll know fairly well what you should wear and what you should not in a party. Most of the Manila clubs’ websites have a page stating the dress codes, and mind you, the only usual note for us women is to NOT wear slippers (but who the hell would even think of wearing slippers in a club?) Your best bet is to wear a dress and a pair of heels; better if it’s a pair that you last longest with. If you can’t usually take long standing, then opt for flats or try wedges. And remember: there’s a fine line between sexy and skanky—but if skanky is what you’re after, then… sure, be my guest.
- Bring your I.D. and be 18.
Don’t even think of leaving your ID because it’s going to be a hassle. There are times where they’ll still let you in though (after lots of embarrassing pleading, drama-making, and money giving.) Meanwhile, if you’re not 18 yet, just… don’t go. But I know that it won’t stop you from taking a brief trip to Recto, no? Haha! So if you want to take your chances on that, then that’s your call too.
- Bring at least one trusted friend. A.K.A. your buddy for the night!
You’ll be needing it; you two will be watching each other’s back, but of course, you should watch out for yourself above all. (If your boyfriend is coming along then good, you’ve got it covered.)
- Don’t bring your huge-assed cameras.
Your SLRs or whatever-you-call-it because some clubs don’t permit those in. Plus, are you really planning on being the ‘cameraman’ of your friends for the remainder of the night? Oh, please no. Bring your small digital cameras instead. But then sometimes, it’s also best not to bring one because that means you’ll be needing a purse; and a purse would often get in the way. You can’t really leave it anywhere.
- Don’t drive.
Best option is to have someone else drop and fetch you at the venue; and this ‘someone’ must NOT be with you in that party. Whhhyyyy? Because by the end of the night, all of you are going to range from crazy, tipsy, wasted, to knock-out. This part of going ‘in and out’ is important to plan out.
You’re not going to a mob town or something. Surely, there are going to be people who will look into taking advantage of you, but you can and always take control of the situation as long as you’re mindful. So don’t get too nervous, it’s just a fun place; but don’t expect too much either. Clubs really are loud places that are crowded and hot. Most of the time, the music would be sh*t too. So aside from imagining that you’re actually going to have fun there, you should also lower your expectations. But err… you know what? For my case, I think the loud and crowded part is the fun thing about clubs. You can really see that everyone is on the same level as you—dancing wildly and letting loose despite the sweat and smoke. HAHA. That’s the reality of it.
- Bring your A-game on.
Sometimes, my friends and I listen to pump-up-music beforehand so when we arrive at the party, we’re all so ready to just storm in and get it on! Haha! This part, the anticipation for the partying, is half the fun!
DURING THE PARTY
- The make or break of the club experience: being with the right crowd.
This wouldn’t always be within your control. Most of the time, you’ll have those friends who are not ‘game’ and they could potentially ruin everyone’s night or the experience overall. So I advise that you just let it be, and have fun with your self or with your buddy-of-the-night. Like what people say: happiness is a choice. And it really is. So you either do something to find it, or be the reason for it, in order to make your clubbing experience worthwhile.
- Act like it’s not your first time.
If not, you’ll be an easy target for jokes and for jerks. Yes’ir. So here’s how it’s going to be: first, they’re going to stamp you. Most of the time, that’s going to be invisible since there’s a black light that’s going to flash over that part of your hand later on—so please, don’t suddenly start exclaiming for all the people behind the line to hear that they should stamp you again since it’s not ‘visible’. Second, if you’re gonna order a drink, don’t ask for the ‘menu’ and then ponder over it for minutes as if you’re in a diner. Just quip the first cocktail you have in mind and then be gone with it. HAHA okaaaay. Kidding aside, yeaaaah, that’s what first-timers usually act and I just think you should know, because… like I said, you might become an easy target (in whatever sense that may be). So anyway, those pretentious little notes aside, what you should actually do is to just…
- Bring an attitude that embodies fun. Let loose. Don’t be a wallflower.
Don’t just stand there like a log on your spot, and if you’re ever in doubt about what to do next… just dance! Give in to the atmosphere because most probably, the only one that would be stopping you from having an awesome time is yourself. But really now, the actuality of this is that once you’re in there in the club, everything will come so naturally to you; whether the music is whack or not, you’ll just find yourself having a good time…
- …But don’t overdo it.
I mean, it’s going to be embarrassing if you do; it’ll look like you’re just being “O.A.” Plus, can I just say? Don’t scream. I’ve seen some of those girls who, when they spot a friend that they know in the throng of people, they’d suddenly go into mental hysterics: “OH MY GAAAAAAHD! YOU’RE HERE TOO! OH MY GAAAAHD! *SQUEALS SOME MORE* PARTEEEEH PARTEEEEHHH NAAAA!” …F*cking idiots.
- And don’t even think about taking your shoes/heels off while still in the club!
You feel like you’re so cool and sh*t. But. Just… don’t.
- Order a drink.
If you’re on the guest list, that doesn’t come with two free drinks; unlike those who paid for the entrance. So just order one drink—best if non-alcoholic. Boring, I know, but it’s your first time. Best if you don’t push it. Now why only one drink? Because not only are the drinks super expensive, but sometimes it’s the guys who’d buy for you anyways as the night goes on (but on the other hand, don’t let them buy it for you unless you know what you’re about to get into.) When ordering, don’t order for the martinis, it will spill everywhere and it’s hard to hold on to those kind of glasses! Opt for something like vodka and soda, or rum, if you’re up for that. But of course…
- …Stay sober for as much as you could.
STAY. SOBER. I’m stressing this for your own good. STAY SOBER, or don’t drink at all. No one would really notice that you’re NOT drinking if you keep yourself occupied with the dance floor. But I know you’re bound to get carried away given all the hype that could happen, so at the very least, keep this in mind: a lady with class always knows how to handle her liquor. Besides, it’s more fun to be the sanest among your friends! By the end of the night, you can watch and laugh to your heart’s content while all of them get all wasted and sh*t. You can even take the honor of documenting their fiasco! LOLJK, but obviously, this is also for safety reasons. Like I’ve said, the guys are on to you. Guard your body, girl! HAHA! Okay, I’m trying to pass this off as a joke, but let’s just be realistic here okay? Most of the guys/men are in there to also ‘score’ anyway; but yeah sure, some are there just to party and dance. Nevertheless, you don’t need alcohol to have a good time. Trust me on this one, sweetie.
NOTE: Staying sober is not a chore; don’t be a babysitter. I know I did say that you must have your buddy-of-the-night, but don’t get all serious and make it like some sort of heavenly obligation to keep tabs on their alcohol consumption all throughout the night. (This applies for your other companions too.) It’s not your grand and sole problem if your friends can’t handle their sh*t together.
- Keep an eye out for your drink.
It’s a no-brainer that drugs are not allowed inside the club. But trust me on this one: there are people who can STILL smuggle those goodies in. I know this because I’ve seen it happen time and time again. That’s why it’s smart to keep an eye out even when the bartender is mixing your drink. Sometimes, if I’d realize that I left my drink in a spot, I’d just leave it there.
- Mind your belongings.
Self-explanatory. No matter how fancy the place is, there are bound to be thieves in there.
- Don’t stay in one spot.
Don’t stay at the bar. Go around with your buddy-for-the-night. Meet some new people. Strike up a conversation. They’re turning out to be a not so good bunch? Move on to the next people then. Or better yet, just stay with your crowd and have fun, but still move around. For instance, why don’t you guys go up that stage and work it like a pole dancer!? LOL NO. DON’T. But really now, just go ahead and have a good time!
TIP: If you want a guy to approach you, don’t huddle in with your ‘girls’. The number one thing that scares guys away is a group of girls that are so tightly-knit as if they’re forming a congregation in the middle of the club. This is why I keep stressing ‘buddy-of-the-night’, cause partying in ‘twos’ is more effective.
- There are no rules in dancing, just move it like you want it.
Not a lot of people would pay attention to what moves you pull anyway. But don’t do anything flashy; it will look awkward and out of place. Don’t even try dancing like a hooker. That’s just nasty. Us girls mostly do this: where we would raise our hand and then just sway from side to side, haha! So typical, but you can start from that.
- Don’t start fights.
It’s not a good sight. People will step on your toes, they might even spill their drink on you at some point, or even burn your skin with their cigarettes. Those are all accidents. It happens. So chill. But if the b*tch did it on purpose, be a classy b*tch in return and do your revenge subtly. Haha jk!
- Say NO when it’s really a no.
In a nice way. You wouldn’t want to upset guys who are intoxicated, would you? Even if they’re practically summoning the Nazi inside of you given their nasty demeanor, stay polite for as much as possible. It’s not good to piss off other girls, so it’s going to be mental of you to try and piss off the guys.
- But try to say YES too.
You can do this provided that you’re sober and still thinking clearly. Aaaaand if the guy is hot. LOL. (But heck, don’t throw yourself all over the place, okay!) So it’s okay to let your judgment cloud your mind a little: go in for that kiss, tear up that dance floor, do whatever! Take risks; these are the ridiculous things that would make up for good stories. Be a little more daring too, like, why not take the initiative? Go and talk to that cute guy/girl. What do you have to lose anyway? And like I said, better if you do it sober because you’ll be doing it classier. “An aggressive drunk is pathetic, but an aggressive sober girl is definitely something else.”
- Be careful when giving personal information.
Self explanatory. Don’t just give everything away.
- Be wary when a guy asks if the both of you could go outside.
So a hot guy approached you. The two of you get to
shouttalk to each other, and things start to go well and smooth. The both of you even started to go over the ‘making out’ border! …when suddenly, he leans in to say the line: “You want to get out of here?” Now remember, if they say such a thing, it’s an invitation to a more heated action, and might even lead to actually leaving the place. This isn’t a good idea. Turn them down politely. Oh, but what did you say? You’re up for it? Then okaaaay. But stay in crowded areas with the guy. And if you want to leave with him, know where the two of you are heading, and let your friends know. But seriously… don’t take your chances on this one. It’s your first time clubbing, for f*ck’s sake. It’s not a good idea to get so liberated all of a sudden. Don’t get too f*cking carried away. (I’m not angry. I just curse a lot! And if you’re a regular reader you’d know how I try hard not to curse too much in this blog especially when I’m trying to make a point. HAHA!)
- RANDOM: Be careful in the restroom.
Because it will transform into an ugly and horrifying place. By the end of the night it will be full of piss and vomit. And I’m not even kidding about this one. So be careful when you walk in. I’ve had several friends who would often trip and get drenched in vomit in there… Icky, I know. That’s why I try to stay away from the club restrooms for as much as I could.
AFTER THE PARTY
- Be safe. Keep safe.
In all aspects.
- A repeat reminder: don’t drive.
- Don’t expect anything more from any guy that you might have met that night.
They’ve said such really romantic things to you, they were so sweet and the night totally became magical. A one of a kind. Full of rainbows and unicorns and—okay missy. Alright. Good for you. You got it going! Give yourself a pat on the back. But you know what? Let me tell you this: that was mostly done in an effort to woo you into kissing them or even into leaving with them. Dear, it’s the club scene. The guys are in there for the same reason why you wanted to be there too: to have a good time. Theirs are just often a bit advanced than your concept of a ‘good time’. Of course there are cases that good relationships have flourished from chance meetings in places like clubs. But they’re very rare. VERY rare. So just… be careful. Most people don’t meet their prince charming in clubs.
UPDATE: Funny how life can be somewhat ironic. I’ve mentioned above how it’s very rare for you to find your partner in a club, but imagine how I am one of those few people now. LOL. You can check out our ‘love’ story here.
If the night had ended very well for you that you can’t seem to get the words ‘epic‘ or ‘awesome‘ out of your system, then hooray for you chikka! Glad to know that you had fun! Cheers to that!!! Wooot!
But if, on the other hand… you had ended the night in a bad note and you felt like you had a sh*tty time, then I’m sorry to hear that. Clubbing may not be for you… or maybe, you weren’t with the right crowd. But hey, if it sucked because there weren’t any guys who paid much attention to you, then please… let’s roll back to what I said in the earlier part of this entry: don’t expect. Don’t go to a club anticipating that men will prowl over you like wolves; men can be classy species too. So if that’s your sole reason for going to clubs, then you’ve got it all wrong.
So don’t be afraid to try partying again, okay? It’s better to enjoy it while we’re still young and able to… As we age on, the magic of clubbing will or most probably rub off on us.
Aaaand there you have it! Overall, I hope this post helps! (It has been really long, yeah? That just shows the volume of follow-up questions that some girls have asked me, haha.) Now if you guys got more to add or if you have something to say, then fire away at the comments box below. I’d really appreciate it if we could throw back ideas about this.
Party up, people!
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Hey there! I am Aileen Adalid.
At 21, I quit my corporate job in the Philippines to pursue my dreams. Today, I am a successful digital nomad (entrepreneur, travel writer, & vlogger) living a sustainable travel lifestyle.
My mission? To show you how it is absolutely possible to create a life of travel too (no matter the odds), and I will help you achieve that through my detailed travel guides, adventures, resources, tips, and MORE!
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CURRENTLY BASED IN: The Philippines
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